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Don't eat where you shit, my friend.

If they posted a sign it’s because they caught someone doing it,


…on December 28th, 2015.

Mr. Dumpulous

When I posted the pic to Facebook a good friend of ours named Greg commented: “This is the most artistic picture of a dog taking a crap I’ve ever seen.”

A couple months later, I sent Greg and Mana (who is Greg’s new wife) a copy of the photo as a wedding gift.

A few weeks ago, Greg sent me this photo:

Fuck the Louvre! My art is hanging in Mana and Greg's bathroom!

That’s right, my photo of Mr. Fabulous taking a dump is now framed and hanging in their bathroom. Greg and Mana can now enjoy this beautiful image for all eternity… or at least every time they take a dump.

I’m honored to have art hanging anywhere in your house, guys, especially in such an important room.

I’m a shartist,


But why?

Rules were made to be broken,


Hope that wasn't used for my fish and chips an hour earlier.

…but at the top of that list is a bathroom stall in a Hong Kong restaurant.

I just threw up in your mouth,


They were taken out of the alley within an hour!

Colonel Sanders stands alone,


Fat bitches need love, too!

The fact that someone felt the need to write that on a bathroom wall is insane,


When we move out of our apartment at the end of the month, I’ll miss the upside-down bathroom tiles that remind me of my childhood. Learn more here.

I won’t miss the tiles by the front door that can’t seem to stay clean for longer than one day.

Thinking of stealing that bathroom tile,


…and an equally profound bathroom response.

Noticed it while taking a leak,


…I kind of look like Jesus.

Yes, I’m really peeing,


This past Friday, a group of us went and saw a friend do improv at a local comedy theater.

While there, I used the venue’s bathroom and found this:

Toilet paper? Check. Air freshener cone? Check. Fresh produce? Ah… check.

But the weirdness doesn’t end there.

Last night, we went and saw a play at a theater in Silver Lake. When I used their bathroom I found this sign taped above the sink:

Well, I would hope so.

What I did in that room was totally legal… except in Arkansas,


Old Poop!