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I hope you do get hit by a bus.

Have fun in Siberia, bitch,


…way to wear your loyalty to the oil industry on your sleeve, douchebag.

I can’t believe you’d publicly kiss the ass of a company that’s currently in the middle of fucking us. Guess you like a little romance with your rape, huh?

Who would have expected something like this from a Texas Republican?!? Not me!

That’s sarcasm,


…I’d rather be a “small person” than a “huge dickhead.”

Keeping twisting that knife, dumbass,


It’s come to my attention that you’ve set aside $50 million for an advertising campaign that you hope will save your public image.

Save your money.

I wouldn’t give a shit if you were the only gas station in the middle of the desert and my gas light just came on, I still wouldn’t give you a dime of my money.

I encourage the rest of the world to do the same by avoiding all BP and ARCO gas stations.

Donate that $50 million to the region, dumbasses,


Dear BP,

I look forward to your contributions to my campaign.


– Rand Paul

Old Poop!