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…Michael Wolff’s Fire and Fury: Inside the Trump White House. Thank Christ.

What did I learn? To never read books on a laptop, phone, iPad, etc. Seriously, for whatever reason, it takes me forever.

Anyway, I’m now reading a book I’ve surprisingly never read before: Roald Dahl’s Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

I can't not see Gene Wilder.

Quite a departure from the insanity of the Trump White House.

While I’m reading this one I’m also going to be reading two graphic novels that were recommended to me by my good friend Erik Rose. They are the first installment of Outcast by Robert Kirkman and Paul Azaceta, and The Black Dahlia by James Ellroy, David Fincher, Matz, and Miles Hyman.

Ping-ponging back and forth between the sweet and the sadistic.

It’s always important to balance out your children’s literature with stories of demon possession and horrifically violent murder.

Sedaris is next,


This cover of “Immigrant Song” as heard in the new trailer for David Fincher’s upcoming “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo”:

Fired up beyond description,


“The Curious Case of Benjamin Button” (Paramount Pictures)

1. Clocking in at just under three hours long, some serious editing could have come in handy.

2. Brad Pitt as a super-old man looks like a creature from that eighties movie “Ghoulies.” You know the one, with the poster where they’re crawling out of the toilet.

Ghoulie? Or Brad Pitt as an old man?

Ghoulie? Or Brad Pitt as an old man?

Yeah. That one.

3. Beautifully shot and a great look and feel, but some of the acting came across as being a bit stilted. Part of this may be due to the fact that some of the actors’ faces were put onto bodies with CG. Or it could be because a lot of aging makeup was used, making it hard to deliver lines naturally through all of that gunk. Or maybe it was just because no one on set could concentrate with so much hot ass in the room.

4. David Fincher strays from what he knows best: serial killers and split personalities. It still works on some level, but the story might be a little too fantastical for him to do it complete justice. Just imagine, for example, if he had directed “Big Fish.” As much as I love Fincher, directors like Burton, Gondry or Jonze may have been more appropriate for the director’s chair.

5. Cate Blanchett is a freakishly hot elf woman. Before tonight, I had never seen anything she’s been in (save for the new Indiana Jones movie, which sucked, so I didn’t pay attention to it), but with this movie I definitely took note. NOTE TO DIRECTORS: Make more movies with Cate Blanchett in it, but put her in movies I will actually go see. To be read: Pixar movies and crappy, cheeseball horror flicks.

RATING: 1 realization that Cate Blanchett is hot, 1 confirmation that Brad Pitt is still hot

And if this is your first night at Fight Club, you have to age backward,


Old Poop!