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I could tell you stories about him—or any of my family members, to be honest—for hours on end, but instead I’ve decided to keep this post short.

All you need to know is this: Hi-Guy was a funny man. A constant jokester, prankster, and false grabber of crotches. Yes, you read that correctly.

Hi-Guy passed away in 2008 at the age of 78. I was 31. In all those years, he sent me two pieces of mail (at least that I can remember), which was ironic because Hi-Guy worked for the post office.

I received the first of these letters was when I was very young. It was a letter from “Mickey Mouse” sent from Disney World. I was ecstatic that such an enormously popular cartoon character would take time out of his animated life to write me. Years would pass before I would put two and two together and realize that it was actually Hi-Guy who had written me under a rodent-based pseudonym.

The only other piece of mail I ever got from Hi-Guy was this letter:

The front of one of Hi-Guy's two letters to me.

The back of one of Hi-Guy's two letters to me.

He wrote that letter (apparently) on May 21st of some year (he only marked the year “Zulu,” and I have no idea what that even means). He sent me that letter in a box when I was in college (so somewhere between 1994 and 1998). Also in that box was a “cheesehead” hat (quite literally, a styrofoam slice of “cheese”) that he had dug out of a dumpster.

NOTE: Hi-Guy was a proud dumpster diver of junk. Or “treasures,” as he so often called them.

The hat had a bite missing out of one of its corners. I always liked to think that a drunken college kid had taken bite out of it one night before tossing it into the dumpster. In reality, a rat had probably gnawed away at it before Hi-Guy picked it out of the trash.

Before he sent it to me, Hi-Guy wrote “HUNGRY” next to an arrow that was pointing to the bite mark. It was pure Hi-Guy. You’ll notice the mention of “HUNGRY” in that letter.

You’ll also probably notice that Hi-Guy had a habit of making up his own spellings of words. Over time, I’ve adopted this practice with words like “tanks” (for “thanks”) and “aite” (for “all right”) and “birfday” (for “birthday”). I take no credit for such goofiness. That was all Hi-Guy.

Hi-Guy most certainly lives on in me. In my sense of humor. In my vocabulary and spellings. And in my memory.

And I feel fortunate that I’ve managed to save one of the two letters he sent me. Also, I don’t think it’s any coincidence that he “signed” the above letter with a Mickey Mouse sticker.

Hi-Guy was Mickey,


…for recently getting his first (and possibly last) tattoo.

Normally I’d say that getting a tattoo at 18 years old is a terrible idea, but this tattoo has a special meaning behind it.

Our late grandfather, known lovingly by most as Hi-Guy, had the same (for the most part) tattoo of Flower from “Bambi” on his arm. Matthew’s tattoo is a nod to a man we all loved very much.

Great stuff, Matthew. He’d be proud of you… and then he’d make fun of you and call you a knob.

Next thing you know Matthew will be digging in dumpsters,


From 1998 to 2007, I ran and edited the humor and entertainment publication (and website) “Tastes Like Chicken.”

Starting in 2002, we began to give our loyal readers a Christmas video card each December. The videos started out very simple and silly (with me in drag lip-syncing as Gladys Knight while Vinnie, Fphatty and Debbie served as my backup Pips), but over time the videos became huge productions with great editing and even a few celebrity cameos thrown in.

The videos from 2003 thru 2006 are archived for you to check out here.

In December 2007, we began working on that year’s Christmas video. The idea wasn’t wildly imaginative, but still fun: A future version of myself would come back in time and visit a present-day me to warn me of a wrong I had to right to save Christmas.

The future version of Wayne Chinsang (or me, for those of you who don’t know that I happily live a double life) was played by my grandfather, Robert “Hi-Guy” Steib.

So one night in early December, Jeremy Scott and I headed over to film all of my grandfather’s scenes.

And that’s about as far as we got.

People always ask me, “What happened to the magazine?” and my answer is always the same: Life. We got older, got married, became parents, moved away… and because of that, had to concentrate on work that would actually pay our bills.

In addition to the regular insanity of everyday life, my grandfather became very ill shortly after filming and had to be hospitalized. A month or so after this was shot, he passed away at the age of 78.

For a year and a half, the footage sat on Jeremy’s hard drive. Finally, fearing that nothing would be done with the footage, Jeremy took what we had and put together a little trailer for the Christmas video that never was.

I’m putting the video up here now because today would be my grandfather’s 80th birthday.

So this one’s for you, Hi-Guy!


Here it is, approximately 18 months late: The 2007 “Tastes Like Chicken” Christmas Video (Trailer)! Better late than never, right?

Keep an eye out at the end for a finale that all my fellow moon-haters should appreciate.

I still hate the moon,



…I do a simple “dead” entry, and follow it up with a few video clips of them from YouTube.

You can see examples of that here, here and here.

This morning, after learning that Farrah Fawcett had passed away, I didn’t know whether to post a blog or not.

Nothing against her, but I simply don’t know that much about her outside of the fact that she was on “Charlie’s Angels”, a show I’ve seen maybe two episodes of. Probably not even that many, to be honest.

But then, during a news story that was covering her death, an image of this poster flashed up on the screen:

Farrah Fawcett's famous poster

My grandfather had that poster hanging on his bedroom door probably as recently as five years ago. I grew up staring at that poster, ogling her cleavage and… gasp! Nipples?!?

Oddly enough, I didn’t draw the connection between Farrah Fawcett and that poster until today.

So rather than post a bunch of video clips of stuff I’m not familiar with, I’m gonna leave you with the image of a poster I was very familiar with as a child.

Strangely, tomorrow would have been my grandfather’s 80th birthday. So this post’s for you, Hi-Guy.

More on Hi-Guy tomorrow,


…scavenging for what he called “treasures.” To everyone else, it was just thrown-out junk; but to him, everything had the potential of being a treasure.

I was out on a walk the other day when I found this Polaroid on the ground:

Do they have dumpsters in Heaven? Or Hell, for that matter?

Do they have dumpsters in Heaven? Or Hell, for that matter?

I can’t make much out of it, but what I can make out is a guy going through a dumpster.

I like to think of this photo as a little “hello” from Hi-Guy.

Hi, guy!


At least my Grandpa Hi-Guy finally gets to meet her.


Old Poop!