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I know it might seem like I sit at home all day long, drinking beer and updating The Blarg, but the truth is I spend much of my day writing.

Lately, most of my writing has been on long-form projects. Because of this, I sometimes write a short (most times comedic, other times not so much) to break up the monotony of those longer projects. But while these shorts are fun to write as an exercise, nobody ever really gets to read them.

To remedy this, I’ve decided to share them here. I’m doing this for two reasons:

1. I like to share! That, and it’s better than having them sit on my computer.

2. It’s my hope that someone might be inspired to actually do something creative with them. Want to film one as a short? Awesome. Interested in animating one? Go for it. Feel like performing one live onstage? I dare you. All I ask is that you give me credit where it’s due, and (if possible) send me a copy of the final product.

The twenty-fifth of Shady’s Shorts is called “You Are (Not) The Father.”

Download it by clicking below.


Number twenty-four,


“You Are (Not) The Father” is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License. Created by Justin Shady, ©2015.

…sent us these amazingly dapper drawings of our beasts for our birthdays.

Mr. Fabulous!

Dapper Mr. Fabulous!


Dapper Meatshake!


Dapper Heisenberg!

We love ’em! Thanks again, Marla!

Those are almost as cool as this “autographed” Maury Povich glossy that Erik and Robyn gave us!

Dapper Maury Povich!

We have the best friends in the world,



When it comes to newborn baby Jesus… you are not the father,


I ain’t that baby’s Santa,


“How do you know she’s a hole-poker?”

I couldn’t write this shit,



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